Time.....why do I feel like it has slowed? I know it hasn't I mean I feel like just the other day I was telling Michelle that I was moving in 40 days...now I look at the 26 days left on my counter and I am a bit floored by the realization. I feel there is so much I need to do but there is only so much I can do while I am still in Utah...things I want to discuss with the Hubby has to wait til he calls again...who knows when that will be. I REALLY hope he calls on the 16th of this month cause I can discuss with him the apartments I have seen and well I know it probably wont happen and I have my list of things of to have and to not do in my hand but I still feel like I will fail.  I think maybe it's far too late to be blogging but my brain is still fired up and I feel the need to vent. Bear with me....
Ah anyways back to Time... I feel I am at the point where I have these dates in my head and they are sort of like a slushy.... I say slushy cause it's not solid like ice but I still have some sort of a date which doesn't make it as fluid as water... it's just a slushy... who knows if that will change I hope it doesn't but it's nice to have something to count down to. Now that I have a count down to it I feel time has slowed... I think I don't have enough to occupy my time while I am finishing out the month in Utah. Let's be honest I don't have friends who just call me up to go hang out... I don't even remember the last time someone did that who isn't my mom or grandma/grandpa. I get people's lives keep going while I am away but I dunno I thought I meant more in some of my friends books than to go the whole 5 months I have been home without so much as a "I am bored let's go shoping/movie/nails/dinner." Do not get me wrong... I am content now. I was down right furious when I first moved home and realized all my friends have moved on... but me being mad at them wasn't going to make them want to hang out with me. Guilt tripping them to get them to go see a movie with me isn't going to make them like me. So now I am just content. I am fine being with my mom and dad I love them and they have been great to have around. I only have 26 days left here and then it's back to California to be with the girls I started this Deployment with. (I dunno how many times I can say it but I LOVE these girls... What I would do without them I have no clue.) But for those of the friends around Utah County and surrounding area I AM moving the first of October...I am having a going away again dinner at the Melting Pot I realize that is a Drive and I don't mind car pooling. I also realize that some if not most of you will have to work.... that's fine, but I will have a lot going on the last week if not longer than that to get prepared for moving... if you want to see me... you know my number.
I am going Apartment hunting the 14 to the 17 of this month... ahhhh! It's sort of like a breath of fresh air... I don't want to go back to California... cause I sort of hate California... but it's home because that is where he will have to go first. I didn't really realize this until later but Home is where he is. I can settle down anywhere as long as he is with me. Back to that apartment hunting... I have been making a list of places that meet my requirements (close to base, pet allowed, washer/dryer) Now I have to find something to fit my price range... which is low. I feel like it's car shopping all over again... I don't like spending money especially HIS money. I have had a job yes but now that I don't have one... well sort of I feel very um... un helpful. It is our money but HE is the one risking his life for it. I feel awful spending the money on the car (but it is our car and he trusts me to make a big financial decision like that.) I will really hate apartment hunting in San Clemente. Onlybecause it is like 400 bucks MORE than our last apartment. I wouldn't mind so much if we were going back to that price range again... but we will save on gas for the Exploder. It is closer to the high way, and the washer dryer will help us with our lack of wanting to do laundry. And of course we need a place that allows cats... (speaking of cat: My mom's cat bit my cat on the tail and we had to take him to the vet... he suggested a cone to get him to stop licking it... I bought something that looks like a giant donut to put on his neck. I have never witnessed something so funny in my entire life. I will post on that later) I am just afraid I will make a mistake and Dave will hate my choice... I suppose if so we will move I mean it can happen... but I just don't want to fail...and in my eyes finding an apartment that he hates is failure. Because we are living north of base it is more expensive... With his HomeComing looming closer and Thanksgiving and Christmas right behind it I plan on doing what EVER he wants for however long we can...which could mean 3 weeks in December I will be in Utah... That also means having a job that will allow that is um...somewhere in the range of unlikely. I will pray and hope for something cause it will be more expensive and I would like to contribute again...but I am afraid that a job willing to let a brand new employee off for 3 weeks in December might not happen. (Shit)
So Ah yeah I am feeling over whelmed. I guess all I can do is pray and let god help me... Until then I will just be here....trying to keep myself sane. Feel free to call me to hang out/talk. I am always free.

On a lighter note I am only 18 lbs away from my GOAL WEIGHT. I feel so much better about myself and Thank God! 18 lbs is NOTHING I got this one in the bag! I hope Dave's jaw drops to the floor when he sees me again. He hasn't seen me that weight since high school so this should be fun!